Do Not Staple

[Slippery Pencil]

In spite of Wisconsin's "DO NOT STAPLE" on the first page of the individual tax return, for the handful of Wisconsin clients I have, I assembly the forms in order and staple them. My question is, where should I staple the W-2s? Should I put them behind the W1 ahead of the 1040 as the assembling instructions say, or since they don't want them stapled, should I put the W2s on top of the W1 so the can easily detach them and proceed to lose them or do whatever they desire with the detached forms?

[Booger]

Ohio has the same stupid rule about not stapling their pages together.

For spite, I always use 2 staples.

I would staple the W2 where the Wisconsin instructions say to put them.

Just my humble opinion.

Vindictive Booger

[mcb39]

In spite of Wisconsin's "DO NOT STAPLE" on the first page of the individual tax return, for the handful of Wisconsin clients I have, I assembly the forms in order and staple them. My question is, where should I staple the W-2s? Should I put them behind the W1 ahead of the 1040 as the assembling instructions say, or since they don't want them stapled, should I put the W2s on top of the W1 so the can easily detach them and proceed to lose them or do whatever they desire with the detached forms?

Wisconsin is VERY particular about assembly order. I don't know what they would or could do to you, but they scold us every year at seminars in regard to this subject; even though most of us are required by state law to e-file returns. And, of course, that saves on staples or paper clips (your assembly tool of choice), paper, toner, stamps, etc.

[Janitor Bob]

Wisconsin is VERY particular about assembly order. I don't know what they would or could do to you, but they scold us every year at seminars in regard to this subject; even though most of us are required by state law to e-file returns. And, of course, that saves on staples or paper clips (your assembly tool of choice), paper, toner, stamps, etc.

Hell...here in Ohio, I staple them prior to e-filing so they get stuck in their computers.

[bstaxes]

Same here in NJ. I just leave them loose in the folds of the return.

[JohnH]

If you really want to mess with their minds, paper clip the forms together and then put a staple over one prong of the paper clip. But only do this if the client owes money.

[Virtual Managed Solutions]

I agree with John. That's a great idea!

[Slippery Pencil]

After John's reply I have to break out this old story.

This story may or may not be true from experiences I may or may not have had with the IRS if I ever did even work for them.

During my short employment tour with the IRS in the mail room, i've found several harmless ways to mess with them and receive no recourse.

Always put staples in the right hand corner. Go ahead and put a row down the whole right side. The extractors who remove the mail from the envelopes have to take out any staples in the right side.

Never arrange paperwork in the right order, or even facing the right way. Put a few upside down and backwards. That way they have to remove all your staples rearrange your paperwork and re-staple it (on the left side).

Line the bottom of your envelope with elmer's glue and let it dry before you put in you forms, so that the automated opener doesn't open it and the extractor has to open it by hand.

If you’re very unfortunate and have to pay taxes use a two or three party check.

On top of paying with a three party check pay one of the dollars you owe in cash. When an extractor receives cash, no matter how small an amount, he has to take it to a special desk and fill out of few nasty forms.

Write a little letter of appreciation. Any letter received has to read and stamped regardless of what it is or what its on.

Write your letter on something misshapen and unconventional. Like on the back of a Kroger sack.

When you mail it, mail it in a big envelope (even if its just a single EZ form). Big envelopes have to be torn and sorted differently than regular business size ones. An added bonus to the big envelope is that they take priority over other mail, so the workers can hurry up and deal with your mess =)

If you send 2 checks they'll have to staple your unsightly envelope to your half destroyed form.

Always put extra paper clips on your forms. Any foreign fasteners or the like have to be removed and put away.

Sign your name in ink on every page. Any signature has to verified and then date stamped.

These are just a few of the fun and exciting things you can do with the man. These methods are only recommended when you owe money.

[RJM]

Anarchrist... Priceless !

[Catherine]

Anarchrist... Priceless !

I read them hours ago and I'm still chuckling.

Catherine

[SCL]

the 'messing with the man' going on here are just poor grunts on the line trying to do their job, sort of like we are trying to do our job...i know i don't like folks reasonably messing with me, let alone a total unreasonable messing with me.

now, (if i could, but i know i really can't) i wouldn't mind messing with state legislators, congressmen, or others who create stupid bottlenecks in my job as a tax preparer.

efile and you don't have to staple anything.

[Terry D EA]

When we had to mail in the signed 8453 forms, many times I received nasty grams threatening to kick me out of the e-file program because I (the stupid one) put more than one form in the envelope and the mail room crew apparently couldn't figure out what to do with the extra forms behind the first one. Now who was messing with who? I'd love to stick it to them but I'd like to watch while they got it as well. I like the glue in the bottom of the envelope thing. he he he! Great post Anarchrist.

Terry D. :lol:

[JohnH]

When they pry my stapler from my cold, dead hands, at least they'll be able to say "He made pretty good use of his computers, but he never surrendered to the e-flilnging pressure."

[SCL]

jh - it was just my suggestion about eflinging (i know your consistent position from many current and past postings, lol)...but, i bet you do not unreasonably put staples on your mailed return filings.

awhile back (way back), i remember someone (you?) commenting on their red, Pink Pearl pencil eraser. i am finally at the end of my multi-year office supply inventory (eflinging prolonged my inventory). i have 2 remaining (i need to get a few more). how about you? i bet you still have an inventory!

[JohnH]

You're right - I don't use the stapler unreasonably. I reserve hassling the authorities for only those situations in which it's clearly called for.

I seem to recall the post about the pencil eraser as well, but unfortunately it wasn't me. However, some of the red beads on my abacus broke off due to overuse, so if you run across any of those I'd be most grateful if you'd send them along. (I can't even find any of those suckers on ebay right now)

[mcb39]

You're right - I don't use the stapler unreasonably. I reserve hassling the authorities for only those situations in which it's clearly called for.

I seem to recall the post about the pencil eraser as well, but unfortunately it wasn't me. However, some of the red beads on my abacus broke off due to overuse, so if you run across any of those I'd be most grateful if you'd send them along. (I can't even find any of those suckers on ebay right now)

Speaking of which, why is it in these days of modern know-how that it is impossible to find a decent eraser.? The ones on pencils are hard as rocks and leave black smears. I guess I need to go back and look through some of my kids' old school stuff. Don't they think we make mistakes anymore? Dont they know we cannot cut and paste, highlight and delete, backspace, etc on pencil notes? Here is a chance for someone to make a lot of money by creating a decent eraser once again.

BTW, John, would you take a look at my post from last night regarding the splitting of a Schedule C. This has me really upset and I forsee LOTS of pencil work to split all that stuff manually. I was hoping that more people would get onto that train and present their thoughts. I guess that posting serious stuff on a Friday evening is not always savvy. It gets lost in the folds of the weekend.

[Catherine]

You're right - I don't use the stapler unreasonably. I reserve hassling the authorities for only those situations in which it's clearly called for.

I seem to recall the post about the pencil eraser as well, but unfortunately it wasn't me. However, some of the red beads on my abacus broke off due to overuse, so if you run across any of those I'd be most grateful if you'd send them along. (I can't even find any of those suckers on ebay right now)

They still sell abacuses in Chinese stores (at least, here in the Boston area). We have a couple and I taught my girls how to use them (though I don't know if they remember). I still use a slide rule (it lives in my car) for figuring gas mileage.

And for Marilyn -- art supply places have good erasers.

Catherine

[jainen]

>>it is impossible to find a decent eraser<<

The problem is not so much the eraser but the pencil. And the users, too. We are altogether too casual about the way we handle what should be revered as the epitome of civilization.

Nowadays graphite is apparently a premium item, so cheap sticks offer black clay with some kind of crusty gum binder. The eraser end is simply decorative. This is true of all the pencils with custom logos or slogans, any kind of special coloring like foil, and the bulk generics from office supply stores. It's also a problem for the thin, unsupported refills in mechanical pencils.

I love writing with a traditional pencil. It is the fastest way to make squiggly lines, perfect for brainstorming, taking minutes of meetings, and annotating books. I still put genuine Dixon Ticonderogas at the top of my list. The eraser is barely useable for a few weeks after you open the package before it dries out and oxidizes. This suits me because I resharpen a lot and toss them when they get down to three or four inches. I also don't erase much, just line out and scribble changes in the margins and so on.

I like the Pink Pearls but they also must be replaced long before they are used up. Even then, they must be kept immaculate which is a challenge because dust and oils get embedded in the soft rubber. Art erasers work well but they are really designed for a different purpose. Although they can remove marks more completely, that's not so important the way I write first drafts. I find art erasers to be too slow and messy for office work.

[Margaret CPA in OH]

My favorite erasers are Sanford Magic Rub and the the white, replaceable erasers in my Pentel Twist-Erase pencils that I use exclusively.