NT Translation of Female Speak...

[kcjenkins]

(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

(2)Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

(3)Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

(4)Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

(5)Loud Sigh: This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

(6)That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's Okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here: This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome'... that will bring on a 'whatever').

(8)Whatever: Is a women's way of saying SCREW YOU!

(9) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to # 3.

[jainen]

>>Hope this helps you guys<<

Thanks, but I still don't understand #2. Especially that last part.

[schirallicpa]

Whatever....

[JohnH]

One of my favorite scenes in the old "NYPD Blue" involves a conversation between Detective Andy Sipowicz & Bobby Simone - when Andy is explaining why he is taking some personal time off. His lawyer wife is pregnant and she has a doctor's appointment that afternoon. (My memory of the dialogue may not be exact, but this is close)

Andy: "Sylvia asked me if I wanted to go to the appointment with her. Thinking I had a choice, I said 'no'."

Bobby: "Bad decision, Andy"

Andy: "Yeah, after what she said back to me, I spent the rest of this morning following her around the house like a puppy begging her to let me go along."

[kcjenkins]

So very true.