jasdlm Posted February 17, 2017 Report Posted February 17, 2017 I am telling you, people consistently give me the crappiest, rustiest, oldest paper clips they can find, which they then use to clip together documents that don't belong together. Where are they getting these nasty things?!? They leave rust on the documents! They have to be older than me. And . . . it's amazing the smells that paper carries. I open an envelope full of 'bits', and there's a giant whiff of anything from perfume to cigarette smoke to pickles. Eeegads. People must try really hard to make these packages this 'special' for me. 11 Quote
RitaB Posted February 17, 2017 Report Posted February 17, 2017 I especially hate the plastic clips in cute shapes. This is no time for cute, people. And of course, I'm with you on the rusty ones. Be sure your Tetanus shots are up to date. 9 Quote
jklcpa Posted February 17, 2017 Report Posted February 17, 2017 The smells are what bother me more, especially the papers from heavy smokers. That gross smell gets on my hands too. Years ago, the firm I worked for had a fish market as a client, and the smell on those papers was nauseating and probably the worst I've ever experienced. 9 Quote
BHoffman Posted February 17, 2017 Report Posted February 17, 2017 I have clients who send such smokey paperwork that I put it in a sealed plastic bag or else my office just stinks! OTOH, I had a pizza restaurant bookkeeping client whose paperwork smelled delicious 10 Quote
jasdlm Posted February 17, 2017 Author Report Posted February 17, 2017 If I had a pizza restaurant bookkeeping client, I would require more than smells! You bring something that smells like pizza, and it had better be followed by the real thing! 9 Quote
schirallicpa Posted February 17, 2017 Report Posted February 17, 2017 try having farmer clients............ 8 Quote
Catherine Posted February 17, 2017 Report Posted February 17, 2017 I have a client who used to bring me all her documents in one of those tins they use to sell Dutch butter cookies. *Everything* smelled like butter cookies - but there were no cookies! So I told her she had to start leaving some cookies in the tin - or bring stuff in a folder. Sure 'nuff - folder. Piffle. I was really hoping for the cookies. In fact, maybe I'll have a piece of shortbread now. 9 Quote
JohnH Posted February 17, 2017 Report Posted February 17, 2017 I once had a client who delivered & maintained Porta-Johns for construction sites... Oh never mind... 9 Quote
FDNY Posted February 17, 2017 Report Posted February 17, 2017 On a brighter side, I have an older client whose tyvex envelope upon opening gives off a strong scent of Nina Ricci or maybe it's Chantilly (I worked in a drugstore during college so I know these things). Always makes me smile, I actually know it's hers before opening. But the smelly, stinky, stained documents with their last meal on them, I'm thinking of going to those nitrile gloves, except that hearing the snap of the glove upon putting it on gives me frightening flashbacks of the doctor's office. 7 Quote
BLACK BART Posted February 17, 2017 Report Posted February 17, 2017 Well, you've all got better stories than me. Only one I can think of is my beauty shop operator client who clips all her papers together with hair clips. No, wait. I remember receiving a large box of all someone's papers -- it's probably been 25 years ago, but in the bottom was a half-eaten sandwich. Thankfully, it had mummified. 6 Quote
Lion EA Posted February 17, 2017 Report Posted February 17, 2017 My hubby got all excited when a large Lord & Taylor box arrived for me, thinking a grateful client had sent a gift. I took one look at the return address and knew it was just a tardy client sending all her tax documents, plus every other piece of paper she had, for a couple of years. What a letdown. 7 Quote
JohnH Posted February 18, 2017 Report Posted February 18, 2017 6 hours ago, BLACK BART said: Well, you've all got better stories than me. Only one I can think of is my beauty shop operator client who clips all her papers together with hair clips. No, wait. I remember receiving a large box of all someone's papers -- it's probably been 25 years ago, but in the bottom was a half-eaten sandwich. Thankfully, it had mummified. Sounds like the Garrison Kiellor story about the time Ole visited the big city for the first time. A panhandler walked up to him and asked "How about giving me a dollar for a sandwich?" Ole replied, "Well OK, but first I need to see the sandwich." 6 Quote
ILLMAS Posted February 18, 2017 Report Posted February 18, 2017 Crappy paper clip, how about receiving a TP envolope with a smell between musty, mildew or cat urine? 3 Quote
BHoffman Posted February 18, 2017 Report Posted February 18, 2017 Dead scorpion in client's "box o' crap" paperwork. Ewwww! Emptied it outside in case there were any live ones lurking in there. 5 Quote
jasdlm Posted February 25, 2017 Author Report Posted February 25, 2017 Client came in to drop off tax information last week. We're sitting together in the conference room going over information. I pull of the 3rd nasty paper clip in a row, and I look her in the eye and say 'Client, these paper clips are older than I am, and I'm going to throw them away now'. Client says 'That's probably a good idea. I got them out of my husband's desk (deceased for some time). He never threw anything away.' What are those things even made of? They feel so awful to the touch! 2 Quote
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