How about this client

[imjulier]

I know, we all have war stories but I just need to rant about this one for a minute. 80 years old, always had a interior design s corp, doesn't understand any question I ask her. Can't be bothered to answer any questions once I get her stuff. She generally just tells me her whole schedule and why she can't get me anything else because she is so busy. Still skis (at 80, which I admire) but doesn't have time for anything else. Then asks why her taxes aren't done. I'm sure she has done this for years with other preparers but I've had her now for about 7 years. I think she is overpaying in taxes but if I don't get answers, I take the conservative approach. I hate to inconvenience my clients so by asking for information.

[RitaB]

I also love it when you tell them their return is ready, and they run down their entire schedule for the next week trying to think it through as to when they will be there to pick up. We really don't care, just pick up.

[JohnH]

Don't forget, you can stuff a LOT of paperwork into a $5.60 Priority Mail envelope.

And that includes the cost of a tracking number.

[mcb39]

But, I want to get paid when he comes in to pick it up and sign the 8879. You know, as in $$$$$$$

[Catherine]

I also love it when you tell them their return is ready, and they run down their entire schedule for the next week trying to think it through as to when they will be there to pick up. We really don't care, just pick up.

i also want them to show up when they say. Delaying lunch because wife calls to say, "He's on the way and will be there in 10 minutes" and he shows 50 minutes later is NOT acceptable. Then the lady who promised to call before she came did not and I heard the car door as I was finishing my last bite of my much-delayed lunch. then they guy who unexpectedly arrived with 8879's when I was in the bathroom trying to fish an eyelash out of my eye - durned near stabbed myself with my own finger when the bell rang.

Argh!!

[kcjenkins]

And don't forget the one who comes in just as you are FINALLY on the way for a bathroom break, and just wants to "ask you just one question" !

[Richcpaman]

And don't forget the one who comes in just as you are FINALLY on the way for a bathroom break, and just wants to "ask you just one question" !

If it was a guy, I would ask him to stand at the urinal next to me and ask away.....

Rich

[Abby Normal]

To me the great thing about efiling during the last week (and especially the last day) is emailing the client the signature forms, having them sign and fax them back, then pick up their returns after the 15th. I encourage them to ask me to email them a copy of their return so they can review it before it's efiled, but less than 1% actually do.

[Crank]

What really get me is missed appointments and tax items they bring up as they are picking up their return. I had a guy pick up yesterday and then ask me if he could take residential energy credit.

[Carolbeck]

Had a couple a few years ago 2005 to 2009 finally get their act together and we filed all of the returns to get them caught up. Refunds etc. Took forever getting their info, had to stay right on top of them. Filed the 2009 in Oct 2010. Never heard from them after that. I called, mailed, etc. No Response.

Yesterday, after getting home from my day job at 7:30 PM, message on my machine: "Hey can we stop down with our tax info (Like we just talked the other day), oh and by the way there are prior years included". Can we have these completed by the 15th? 2 Self Employed people, no estimated taxes, 2 separate business, etc. NOT Happening. I told my husband if they try to drop off anything, to tell them I am not taking on any new clients at this point. They will have to find another preparer.

Unbelievable!

[Jack from Ohio]

Had a couple a few years ago 2005 to 2009 finally get there act together and we filed all of the returns to get them caught up. Refunds etc. Took forever getting their info, had to stay right on top of them. Filed the 2009 in Oct 2010. Never heard from them after that. I called, mailed, etc. No Response.

Yesterday, after getting home from my day job at 7:30 PM, message on my machine: "Hey can we stop down with our tax info (Like we just talked the other day), oh and by the way there are prior years included". Can we have these completed by the 15th? 2 Self Employed people, no estimated taxes, 2 separate business, etc. NOT Happening. I told my husband if they try to drop of anything, to tell them I am not taking on any new clients at this point. They will have to find another preparer.

Unbelievable!

BIG CASH RETAINER!! Just say yes I can, but not by the 15th. Extension for 2013, and you will lose any refund for 2010.

If they balk, give them the phone number for HRB.

[JohnH]

if they are suddenly trying to get it done by the 15t, I'm betting they are either applying for a loan or IRS is breathing down their neck. Both would be deal breakers for me.

[Lion EA]

Huge deposit and promise summer (or fall) completion estimated as one month after ALL information delivered to you. What Jack said. If you have time for 2010 by the 15th, offer it at 2X your usual price, or 3X, paid in advance.

[kcjenkins]

I'm with Lion and Jack. Sure that sort is a pain, BUT they can also be the source of SIGNIFICANT income. Demand a hefty retainer, and file extension.

[GeneInAlabama]

To me the great thing about efiling during the last week (and especially the last day) is emailing the client the signature forms, having them sign and fax them back, then pick up their returns after the 15th. I encourage them to ask me to email them a copy of their return so they can review it before it's efiled, but less than 1% actually do.

By this time I already have an extension filed for them and it doesn't matter if they get it back to me by the 15th.

[Carolbeck]

if they are suddenly trying to get it done by the 15t, I'm betting they are either applying for a loan or IRS is breathing down their neck. Both would be deal breakers for me.

I figured they probably are getting many letters from the IRS and that is what it took last time to light a fire under them. Honestly, I do not know how people who operate like this can sleep at night. I would be worried sick.

[Carolbeck]

I'm with Lion and Jack. Sure that sort is a pain, BUT they can also be the source of SIGNIFICANT income. Demand a hefty retainer, and file extension.

That was another one of the problems. "We do not have any money" I got them caught up last time as a gift and did not charge them that much. Not counting all the Bookkeeping (as they had a shopping bag full of receipts) and then the Tax Returns. I charged them $200 per year including the Bookkeeping. At this point in my life, these clients are not worth the stress as I am not able to go the 36 hours of no sleep anymore. I have 8 other returns in the hopper to be completed before the 15th.

As Jack in Ohio has always said. "Poor Planning on your Part, does constitute an Emergency on my part". Sometimes it is just not worth all the $$$ in the world. I really want to spend Saturday with my 18 yr old daughter and go to the Cornell Veterinary School Open House. This is her dream. So I think I will!

[kcjenkins]

Well, that clearly changes my advice. I agree with you, such people are ONLY worth the trouble if they can pay dearly for all the problems they present.

[Catherine]

Guy emails me this morning looking for a new copy of his 2011 return. Still owes almost $1,000 in back accounting, bookkeeping, and QuickBooks work, some going back to Feb 2013.

Told him - by email - sure; ONLY upon prepayment of $40 for processing and mailing the prior-year return - and BTW, unless you start making payment arrangements on this past due amount, it goes to a collection agency next month.

So far haven't heard back. Fine with me! But I'll still send him to collections....

[Lion EA]

Good grief, Carol, don't try to do anything except the 2013 extension now. Tell him your bookkeeping fee and your tax prep fee and require no less than half before you start the work -- when you are available to work during your regular business hours. If he's already told you he doesn't have the money, then I'd probably ask for it ALL before starting work or stop when you use up his retainer and wait for the next progress payment. He's the one that's late. Don't pull any all-nighters for him.