Laugh of the day

[kcjenkins]

The Problem With Social Networks

"Social Networks" like Facebook are booming -- especially Facebook. There's only one problem with them: to communicate there, members pretty much have to write. How can that be a problem? After all, all of us learned to write in school, right? Well, no! And here are some real life examples.

Rachel: "I'm board."

Jeff: "I'm chalk, we should get together."

Rachel: "BOARD! Like I don't have anything to do, not BORD, like a chalkbord. Learn to spellcheck."

Jeff: "Oh god I hope you don't breed."

Abigale to Darcy: "You shouldn't be aloud to talk."

Darcy: "You shouldn't be allowed to spell."

Post: "Never leave facebook open. Sueing _______ for defaming my character."

Reply: "You did not spell 'suing' correctly and you're in law school so I think you just defamed your own character."

Catrina: "Just found out the US is bombing Labia...THAT SUCKS!...I wish we didn't have to fight so much."

Steven: "They should leave female anatomy alone...."

Jenny: "Sweetie... We are Bombing Lybia...We would really be in trouble if we were bombing Labia. O_o OUCH"

Brooks: "I do my best to keep the peace with Labia.... Beautiful scenery there...."

Cory: "DONT LET YOUR EMOTIONS OVER POWER YOUR INTELIGENCE'S"

Alexa: "seriously?"

Cory: "ya why ?"

Alexa: "overpower* intelligence*"

Cory: "WUT? CUZ I DIDNT PUT SPACES . are u stupid"

Poster: "when is the point when you no that you cant fail worse?"

Reply: "When you realize you spelled 'know' incorrectly."

And here's why this happens:

Alyssa: "honer roll now with mostly a's and 1 b hopping for princapals honer roll next time :-)"

Lee: "Just curious, does your school give spelling tests?"

Alyssa: "nope y?"

That, and:

Post: "....thank you Massachusetts for making it impossible for me becoming a teacher. Stupid ass MTELs"

Reply: "'For me becoming a teacher.' I suspect Massachusetts has its reasons."

Poster: "for anyone to become a teacher. the tests are rediculous."

Reply: "Rediculous? You sure they are not greeniculous?"

Poster: "ha. =) its just a test that is suppose to test you on your reading and writing....but its over stupid topics like chocolate and mexican landmarks."

Yeah. That.

[kcjenkins]

Just one more, simply because I totally cracked up over this one!

The Worst Ethnic Joke Ever Told

As it's not politically correct to direct a joke at any particular ethnic minority, try this one:

An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Latvian, a Turk, a German, an Indian, several Americans (including a southerner [but certainly not a redneck!], a New Englander, and a Californian), an Argentinian, a Dane, an Australian, a Slovakian, an Egyptian, a Japanese, a Moroccan, a Frenchman, a New Zealander, a Spaniard, a Russian, a Guatemalan, a Colombian, a Pakistani, a Malaysian, a Croatian, a Uzbek, a Cypriot, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Chinese, a Sri Lankan, a Lebanese, a Cayman Islander, a Ugandan, a Vietnamese, a Korean, a Uraguayan, a Czech, an Icelander, a Mexican, a Finn, a Honduran, a Panamanian, an Andorran, an Israeli, a Venezuelan, a Fijian, a Peruvian, an Estonian, a Brazilian, a Portuguese, a Liechtensteiner, a Mongolian, a Hungarian, a Canadian, a Moldovan, a Haitian, a Norfolk Islander, a Macedonian, a Bolivian, a Cook Islander, a Tajikistani, a Samoan, an Armenian, a Aruban, an Albanian, a Greenlander, a Micronesian, a Virgin Islander, a Georgian, a Bahamanian, a Belarusian, a Cuban, a Tongan, a Cambodian, a Qatari, an Azerbaijani, a Romanian, a Chilean, a Kyrgyzstani, a Jamaican, a Filipino, a Ukrainian, a Dutchman, a Taiwanese, an Ecuadorian, a Costa Rican, a Swede, a Bulgarian, a Serb, a Swiss, a Greek, a Belgian, a Singaporean, an Italian, a Norwegian and 47-53 Africans walk into a fine restaurant.

"I'm sorry," said the snooty maître d', "but you can't come in here without a Thai."

[kcjenkins]

Take That Power Pole And Stick It!

I was getting ready for work when I looked out the window and saw the utility company starting to erect a pole. Not only was it right in front of my new house, they were going to position it directly in front of my picture window! No way was I going to permit this!

I gulped down my last bit of coffee and went directly to the crew supervisor and told him in no uncertain terms that I was not going to permit his crew to put that stupid electrical pole directly in front of my picture window.

He didn't seem too impressed. He took out his map for pole locations and a right-of-way document and explained that that spot was the best location for it. I told him it is not the best location for me, and when I came home from work that day I did not want to find that pole in front of my window or there would be trouble! I told him I didn't give a hoot where he put it but not in front of my window. I felt pretty smug as I drove off to work because I felt I got my point across. I knew darn well they are afraid to put it there.

Ah, the feeling of power! At least, until I got home:

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.

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(For the visually impaired, the photo shows a house with a power pole in front of it -- planted right in the middle of the driveway.)

[Kea]

True story. I saw this on one of the other forums I read:

>>Some people vote for the greater good of the country as a hole, not just what is best for themselves. There in lies the difference!<<

Somehow, I don't think that was the meaning he had in mind!